Kicking myself in the nuts with regret

But of course I'm not going to tell you that.

I've started reading Jodi Picoult's My Sister's Keeper. I'm disappointed already. I hate present tense when it comes to novels. Now I have 423 pages to live through. I want to watch the movie, and I plan on ruining my experience by reading the novel first. Now I'll see what's taken out of the film. It's challenged me though. Will I cry throughout the movie? Many people that are emotional have. That I know of anyway.
Will I? Am I heartless?

I don't know why I said what I said yesterday. I wish I didn't. Regretful, actually. It's not a nice feeling. But all those other feelings tht I felt were. And today too.